KAVENLOVEYOU<3

2008-05-13T14:26:00.000+08:00

MOVED!

http://kaventan.livejournal.com/ ((:

2008-04-29T23:58:00.000+08:00

lazy t blog, Bye.

crying like a bloody loser again,
i feel so lost and stress.
everything is my fault,
everything is cause by me.
i'm such a bastard and fucker.
i lost control of myself again.
thinking aimlessly,
feeling so lost,
who's there t pick me up and get me back on my feet.
who can make me smile from the bottom of my heart again,
who can make me really really happy again,
i will be with you, i will marry you.
sad t say, i think it's quite hard.
somethings are best left unsaid,
the truth always hurt.
i don't even know what the fuck is wrong with me.

kaven's dead, BYE (:
i'm gonna be quiet & live in my own world again.

2008-04-27T16:21:00.002+08:00

never blog for a longggggg time.
just finish chinese paper 1, english paper 1 & 2 recently.
next paper will be on 5th of may.
3rd of may is coming, ((:
downtown after school almost everyday.
friday, bedok, town, MOS, kaevis's.
drink and drink, some things happened.
i cut my finger, hahahaha.
saturday, tampines mall, downtown.
andrew's birthday, when the clock strike, it was maverick's.
had fun at downtown ytd,
whack people, sing along.
me, kat and aloy were singing oldies at mac,
sylvia laugh her ass off at aloy.
blahblahblah, conclusion was, FUN!
most of them left alrdy,
it was about 12plus,
Julius, Darrel, Andrew, Ying, Phebe, Germaine, Maverick & me
made our way t E-Hub,
went t check the movie time,
we were argueing about what t watch.
in the end we decided on, The hottie and the nottie.
my Gf is acting in it, Paris Whitney Hilton! ((:
watch till 415 like that,
then germaine, darrel, maverick send me home on bike.
today, HOME SWEET HOME!
my dumb cousin, amanda is at my place now.
bathe the stupid dog just now.

plans for next week,
MONDAY, Wild Wild Wet with amanda cousin, sam and michelle.
TUESDAY, idk where t go, home?
WEDNESDAY, maths tutorial?
THURSDAY, physics tutotrial?
FRIDAY, meeting _________ (fill in the blank) at downtown with kat.
drinking at townpark after that, things not well planned yet.
SATURDAY, OUT OUT OUT! idk where yet.
SUNDAY, HOME SWEET HOME! (:

exams coming, gonna study, but i got no motivation at all.
pierced my smiley last thursday.
waiting for someone's msg/call now,
taking sooooooooo longgggggggggg.
i'm damn hungry now, waiting for 6 t come,
then amanda will cook for me! ((:
mummy and daddy at granny's place now.
damn bloody bored now, online talking t that crazy woman, sylvia.

byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, will update soon(:

imissyou,
you always keep me in suspense,
you're so that mysterious.
leaving me here with that pinch in my heart.
i wanna see you.

2008-04-16T23:49:00.000+08:00

recent photos((:

2008-04-16T23:30:00.000+08:00

school was damn bloody fun today,
especially after recess.
manjot singh and some malay guy got beaten up,
joined in the fun.
smoke after school,
headed back t school for maths tutorial.
tutorial was damn slack today, used the com.
end at 3, home for maggie lunch.
prepared, met amanda and bella.
walked around white sands.
headed t downtown,
met phebe, zhilin, ying, jodie, sam, germaine.
sit there and talk,
had some debate session there.
sam's mum call her,
i talked t laoma, she ask me t join her and uncle for a drink.
so when she reach,
me and sam went over t look for them.
tried t beat her high score in photo hunt.
drink, play pool, photo hunt.
cab home at 1030 like that.
blogging and talking t kat and sylvia online,
entertaining ourself now.
gonna upload photos later.
took photo with laoma just now.
uncle dave talk alot just now,
story telling session was on just now, mostly about india. HAHA!
tmr, physics tutorial after sch,
netball match at 3plus, against boardrick sec, cool.
no plans for the day yet,
bye(:

i'm sorry.

2008-04-15T21:34:00.000+08:00

FRIDAY
met bella, ahboy & amanda.
had a fun time at the playground.
cam-whore with bella like crazy.
kimberly went home after that.
me and amanda made our way t town park.
updates and walk her home at 2am plus.

SATURDAY
cut hair, met kimberly,maryann, kaevis at city hall.
made our way t tampines ikea.
walked around, eat dinner at courts.
amanda and bella came,
eat meatball and all.
kimberly,mary and kaevis left.
me, amanda & bella walked around,
cam-whore again like crazy.
bella and me pose around and laugh like mad.
made our way home at 10plus.
took taxi, send amanda home, i left for downtown.
drop amanda off at her house area,
the both of us were cursing and swearing at the indian uncle,
he drove wrongly, and amanda was being racist after that.
reached downtown,
had another crazy session with kat, zhilin and the rest.
it's damn hilarious, kat took a video of me n zhilin.
4 steps t seducing someone, haha!
we laugh all the way till we went home.
enjoyed myself alot!
will upload the IKEA photos later(:

MONDAY
went simei after school,
met philana and sam at pasir ris.
talked and talked.
left for downtown after that.
went t eat dinner at sweet house,
with zhilin, sam, sylvia, andrew, germaine and maverick.
laughed our ass off the moment we sat down.
i disturb the girl there,
i ask her for her no. and all.
she is 20 yrs old, i say i was 18 and all the nonsense.
haha, i keep insisting i want her number.
she say what 999 or what shit.
i say she look damn pretty and all,
i was just kidding k.
disturb people around, had fun too.
went home at 10plus.
bad news at night, sigh.

TUESDAY
feeling so wrong in school today,
scold some teacher during chinese,
she cry and slam the door as she left.
trouble after school.
went home t change and left t downtown then 418.
yingying, vanessa and all came down.
left t downtown, went home at 6plus.
sister came home with wilson kor.
dinner dinner dinner.
went down t meet kimberly,
talk things out.
crying session later, sigh.

to you:
i'm sorry, i'm sorry, i'm sorry.
i think that's all i can say t you.
when i see you cry just now,
i felt something in my heart.
when you left just now,
i felt a pinch in my heart again.
i think i'm just now a good gf,
i'm not a good gf material.
i dont know what's with everything that is happening.
i wouldnt fall out with you just t make you forget everything.
i dont wanna follow simin footsteps.
i really dont know what t do.
i'm so stress now,
i dont know what's on my mind.
gonna blog about what i feel after i sort out my thoughts.
if by me not contacting you makes you feel better then tell me,
or is there anything i can do t make you feel better.
it really hurts t see you like that just now.
the minute your tears drop,
i felt damn bad and i was really affected.
when i wipe your tears,
i wipe it on my face,
i didnt know what t do.
sigh, i'm sorry.
bye,

2008-04-09T21:18:00.000+08:00

Baobei,
i miss you and the fun we had together.
nowdays, we seem t be like strangers.
look at each other and walk pass each other.
not that i dont wanna acknowledge you,
there's so much that i wanna say,
but nothing seem t come out of my mouth.
all i can say is sorry,
and i know t you sorry means nth alrdy.
but other then saying sorry,
i really dont know what can i do alrdy.
looking at or photos and all makes me think about everything we went thru.
& i really miss the retarded times we had tgt.
going t Toy's R Us and play like a kid
going for our Sushi craving, and had our fill.
our daily drinking session at townpark last holiday,
and pour out all our sorrows.
it was the period of time that i enjoy the most.
i'm the one that you bella pamper alot,
i know it best myself, how well you guys treat me last time.
i know that my attitude sucks sometimes,
i know that i'm dam bloody irritating MOST of the time.
i know you two keep giving in t me everytime.
i know i'm the one at fault.
i know whatever that is happening now.
the feeling sucks everyday,
recess, you and me at the same table.
i look at you, and i will be at a lost of words,
thinking when will the day come that we'll talk at the table.
i really dont know when will the day come that we two start talking again.
you and bella are still my bestest friend,
seriously, nobody can replace you two.
i'm sorry for not showing how much i care about you two.
i'm sorry,
& i really miss you.

LOVE,
things are wrong now,
you and i know it best ourself.
but i dont even know what's wrong.
ever since sunday,
i didnt see you till today.
i will only get t see you on friday.
if i didnt something wrong, i'm sorry.
you know it best when we say lets work things out,
and when we manage t work things out,
things will happened again right.
if we really really wanna work things out,
lets work things out so that,
history will not repeat itself again.
i miss you, loves <3>

2008-04-02T15:48:00.001+08:00

suppose t go t school at 4pm,
meet the parents session.
my class is havoc now,
everything is like in a chaos.
time in school seem t past so fast,
yet when school ends, time pass damn slowly.
thinking what t do after school everyday.
stop hanging at 418 or downtown,
yet i still feel so lifeless.
feeling very tired now,
my eye lid gonna close any moment.
baby is out with her friends,
wanna thank her for coming down ytd t watch me slp.
i was sick, i'm still feeling damn sick now.
she is taking ages t reply me.
had a little and small issue with her now,
i just hope she will trust me and all.
time seem to pass so slowly,
i'm with her for only 10 days,
yet it seems like one month had pass.
feeling so weak these days,
dont even feel like using my brain t think about anything.
tmr SAC's band concert, i think i will just fall aslp, haha.
bye people, shall blog again later, i think.

i have one thing t tell you,
and i dont mind saying it a million and one time,
and the thing is, i really love you.
i've tired my best, and i'm still trying my best.
don't worry baby, things will be fine soon.
you're the only one i see in me.
promises i made t you will be kept,
i will do anything just t be with you.
i wanna hug you like ytd,
sometimes i wish i can control the time,
and i will stop the time at the very second that i hug you.
i didnt wanna let you go ytd, but i got no choice.
be honest with each other next time ok,
seriously, dont hide things alrdy
i hope you understand what i'm feeling.
love, i miss you & i love you alot!(:

2008-03-30T18:29:00.000+08:00

THURSDAY
skip chemistry tuitorial,
home, changed, lied t baby,
left t tm with amanda and bella.
walked around t look for bella stuffs,
pasar malam after that.
reach sac at 520,
sat there till 6plus,
then, SURPRISE!(:
baby got a shock when she saw me, hehe.
went for dinner at downtown.
418 then home after that.

FRIDAY
school, home, changed.
rush down t sac t pick her up.
met fel and kaevis there.
fel left with peckli t tm for movie,
marcia my mdm came out and talked t me,
suspose t bring her pe t-shirt home for wash,
in the end baby throw it back t her! haha!
went t some shop and sit there.
me and baby left at 230, go bedok inter.
met zoey and clara.
went t look for sam and weihan.
they left, me clara, zoey went t princess mac.
philana and shengyang came.
baby went home t change and came back
caught a movie at 615, shutter.
kuan join us for the movie.
i was laughing in the cinema all the way.
at the last part, i climb t the back row.
and suddenly hit clara's chair and scream damn loudly.
she and zoey scream like nobody's business.
philana, shengyang and baby keep laughing.
i was like laughing when the scary part came out.
not fun at all.
after movie, kuan left t work.
shengyang,philana and clara went t EM.
me, baby and zoey went t tm,
meeting amanda,bella and boy.
so excited for them t meet each other.
anyway, walked around then left t pasir ris.
amanda, baby and me went townpark t drink.
pasir ris park then home sweet home.
baby stayed over at my place.
blahblahblahblah.
went t granny's place for dinner.
baking at home after that,blueberry and chocolate muffin.

SUNDAY
woke up early in the morning,
market in the afternoon.
slept like a pig, woke up, dinner dinner! (:
no leftover today, good!
blogging now, later going downstairs for awhile.
meeting baby tmr after her cca! (:

i miss my gf, she's love<3
baby, you made me very happy, thank you.
condo and sports car as promised ok!
back t aussie, as promised too(:
i will promise you anything and everything,
and i will mark my words.
i love you(:

2008-03-26T20:48:00.002+08:00

yesterday met baby at whitesands bus-stop.
walked t 418, played ball.
dowtown for dinner with her and philene.
baby and me left at 9plus, headed home.
she stay at my place till 11.
walked her t the bus stop(:
promise promise promise again and again, haha!
i'm filled with promises, tsk tsk tsk.

got back my physics paper, 31/40! (:
damn happy ok, no need t go for re-test already.
cause re-test is next thursday, and i'm not free,
so lucky that i pass ok!
met kaevis, maryann,baby and lijie at downtown,
eat, crap around, disturb metta gf.
laughed our ass off at her and her brother.
it was 5 pm alrdy, me and lijie left for bball court.
baby called me when she reached home,
talked things out and all, (:
home with amanda after that!
dont know what t do tmr, boringggggggggg.
mummy is watching tv, so noisy,
put earpiece on, drowning myself with songs.
bye! (:

baby, we will work things out tgt yeah.
things will be fine, i wouldnt let you down
& dont think so much alrdy ok.
i know you did cry just now, dont lie t me alrdy.
must keep our promises t each other ok,
talk things out if something goes wrong.
having you around is great enough,
looking at you smile and laugh makes me happy too,
nothing else matters t me anymore.
all i ask for is for you t be happy with me.

if one day I say i dont love you, dont miss you, dont need you anymore,
i can tell you, i'm lying thru my teeth.
cause you're my happy pill, my everything.

BUT
if one day we have nth t talk about, i will find something t talk about.
if one day you dont feel like seeing me, i will make you look at me at least once.
if one day you stop loving me, i will try all ways t make you love me again.
if one day you dont miss me anymore, i will make you think of me again..
if one day you choose t leave, i will beg you t stay.
reason why i will do all these, simple,
cause i love you<3
ILY,IMU(:

p.s. i buy you a condo and sports car k, then marry me(: hahahahahahahaha!

2008-03-24T23:20:00.001+08:00

addicted t that song,
with you, with you, with you, with you, with youuuuuuuuuuuu(:

school was boring,
singing in the bloody toilet during mother tongue.
after school, changed, down t white sands t meet madeline&co.
celebrate her birthday, i smear chocolate on her face.
play ball after that, home by 7plus.
mummy & daddy went out,
leaving me and kor at home alone.

talking t baby on the phone and msn now,
crapping all the way, disturbing her cause she cant log into friendster.
and singing over the phone now,
argueing with her that i'm not singing, when i'm.
yes yes, i'm living in self denial ok. haha!
yay, will be seeing her tmr! (:
TELL ME WHAT THING! say read your LJ then ask you,
hurry say, stop being selfish!
your favourite phrase: " don't angryyyyyy ehhhhhhhh!" :D
hurry say hurry say.
always irrtate me t sing t you, sing t you , then you say change song. haha!
girls are so troublesome, tsk tsk tsk.

loveeeeeeeeee, i miss you! (:
love youuuuuuuuuu,
i'm glad i've you in my life,
you're the best part of my life<3

with you, with you, with you, with you, with youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu<3

2008-03-23T15:38:00.000+08:00

me and kaevis fucking witness a car accident,
saw the malay guy fly.
met up with evelynn, keon, annie, kuan, xinyi and loads more!
DXO party postponed in the end.
walked t viva,
drank 3 jars, alright, i admit,
i was a little drunk alright.
headed t kaevis house after that.
watched dvd till 5plus.
fall asleep, due t kim's irritating phone, i woke up at 10plus.
watched kids central,
mary and kaevis cooked noodles and egg.
left kaevis's at 12plus,
reached home, bathe, talked t baby for awhile.
using the com now, waiting for mummy t come home.
i need some sleep manxZxxZxxXzX.
cousin over at my place now, watching tv.
baby is sleeping now, im so bored!

I LOVE MY BABY, KIMBERLY SACHDEV! <3
i will keep my promises to you k.
see you on wednesday!
i knw i was drunk ytd,
but i know clearly what i said t you.
i never regret and i wouldn't.
rmb t voice out things that you're unhappy with.
i wanna make you happy! (:
we can always work things out when things goes wrong.
baby, i miss you(:

2008-03-22T14:27:00.000+08:00

out with kaevis, kimberly, fel, maryann, ciwei & candice ytd.
walked around town t look for kaevis's jeans.
went t forum, sit at coffeebean.
walked t lido then t cine,
watched movie, semi-pro.
the movie was damn hilarious alright.
movie end at 9,
ciwei left t far east, fel home, maryann meet her sister.
me, kaevis and kimberly left t tanah merah.
walked quite a distance,
met marcia at her house bus-stop.
walked t the park and chit chat.
played swing with kim,
talked for quite long, till 115.
then we left the place.
home sweet home after that.

going city hall later,
meet marcia and kim.
kaevis meeting us at 6.
heading t DXO after that.
it's been some time since i club already.
xinyi and friends, szekuan and friends will be going. (:
shall have fun tonight!

i mean everything i say t you,
i'm not the old kaven anymore.
when i say i like you, i really mean it.
i miss you. (:

with <3,
kaven tan xiao qiang

2008-03-16T21:23:00.000+08:00

these few days nothing much happened.
missed the zouk party,
maryann and kimberly kept bugging me that day to go.
in the end i didnt turn up.
418, downtown east and elias mall.
been playing lan these few days.
meet up with cheryl, weihan, eric and all.
drinking almost every night.

went t cousin's 21th birthday ytd.
after that rush t downtown chalet.
met kaevis and kimberly and two more girls.
the two girls left.
then me, kaevis and kim went t mac and stone.
kaevis parents came, i send kim out t take cab.
she drop me off at my hse area.
been disturbing her ever since i met her.
haha, no teeth woman.
and she calls me, the cow who cant point middle finger.

been playing the rubik's cube nowadays.
i know how t solve one side already.
learning how t solve the whole thing.
my cousin say i look very cute when i play the cube.
cause i look very serious, haha.
school reopens tmr, damn bloody boring ok.
i cant wait t disturb my teachers.
confirm got spot check tmr, sian.
nothing much t blog already,
got forced by alot of people t blog.
bye.
upload photos soon. (:

your smell still lingers around me,it's addictive.
i miss you.

2008-03-06T00:48:00.001+08:00

yesterday went down to downtown east,
at night went t amanda's place t drink.
i became i drunkard when i reached home.
slept at 3plus, having serious headache,
my room seems like it's spinning, haha!

woke up at 10plus,
suppose t go town with amanda and bella.
in the end got family dinner, lazy go s far.
in the end cancelled, was feeling damn bored.
rachel msg me, she thought i was in school, wanted t pick me up.
planned the day, decided t go tanning with her.
met at downtown, tan for awhile, it fucking rain.
took shelter, went t eat sakae.
in the end, go central, cause rae wanna alter shorts.
took the same bus as nigel they all.
after sending the shorts to alter,
both of us deciding where t go.
going my place, in the end she trick me,
so when t her place, very long never go alrdy.
first thing i did was lie down, damn comfortable.
both of us play the laptop, looking for girls in friendster, haha!
did some retarded things, then played wardrobe.
i was force to wear on stupid things.
then took photos and all.
went t the kitchen t bake muffins.
it turned out funny!
was there from 4 plus till 9pm.
had loads of fun today, two retards.
she send me t the bus-stop, brownie tag along.
seriously, that dog is irritating,
keep licking my leg, sick dog.

went 418 t meet jodie.
sylvia pass me cig,
me,zhilin,jodie,kat and pui go dwntown.
the rest played block catching.
me, kat, jodie played ddr, i didnt fail alrdy.
i did improve ok! haha.
jasmine came down t meet me.
went t mac, amanda came down.
send her home after she eat.
smoke and talked under her blk.
walked home and talk on the phone.
home sweet home, nights!
photos below!(:

i seriously hate mas selamat! ):
asshole, make us live in fear.
such a fucker.

i miss you(:

2008-03-06T00:30:00.000+08:00

baby(:

2008-03-05T12:22:00.000+08:00

when i hear that song, i'll think of you.
i broke down once again.
imissyou.

2008-03-05T00:42:00.002+08:00

seriously, i miss you alot now.
nothing can express how much i care about you.
i'm trying t act s if nothing had happened,
but i really cant take it anymore.
acting that i don't care at all is seriously very tiring.

2008-03-02T03:36:00.000+08:00

PHOTOS(:

2008-03-02T03:18:00.001+08:00

being going downtown these few days,
yesterday was havoc at downtown,
me, amanda, vanessa, katherine.
we were laughing our ass off at mac ytd.
took alot of photos, took and laugh.
they will know what was it, haha!
walked sylvia and panzi t the bus-stop,
there was no more bus, so we waited for panzi mother.
after that went home with amanda.

today went town with angel,
met sam and philana after that.
go downtown and slack.
had a game of pool with phebe and kat.
yingying keep shouting underage when ben come in,
damn hilarious, we were gossiping about others.
vanessa and all came down.
keep walking here and there, leg pain.
stupid construction, make us walk a very long way.
played DDR with ying, vanessa and kat.
i swear i suck at it ok! haha!
i look like a fucking retarded robot ok.
and once i play, the stage will fail, fuck.
so they only allow me t play the last stage.
and true enough, i played with ying, and we failed the stage, haha!
went back to mac, talk crap.
kat, vanessa, phebe and yingying keep playing with their photo camera.
nigel, sylvia and the rest came back from ghost tower.
sylvia and guanli saw things.
smoking and smoking just now.
bought two pack today already, left with 6 sticks now, smoke machine(:
vanesa and me walked so fast just now,
then yingying was like all the way at the back with be and philene,
so me and vanessa wait for them at the bus-stop.
panzi, nigel and sylvia was at the bus-stop also.
ying they all came already,
walked home with phebe, ying, philene and vanessa,
at the traffic light just now was the funniest ok. haha!
now blogging, gonna sleep soon, having headache.
anyway, amanda call off the bet already.

baobei, lets work things out. i dont wanna leave things the way it is now. i'm sorry.

(: i love you.

2008-02-27T23:13:00.000+08:00

met kuan just now, talked alot just now under my blk.
so fucking bored now,
play basketball just now,
my legs are aching like hell now.
played match with sylvia, panzi and amanda.
finally amanda did something today,
she didnt stand there and do nothing.
walked home then saw kuan.
we walked t my hse there t meet sam and philana.
then all went home.
later must find blue file and file all the physics things in.
camp coming soon! not going! hahahaha!
i'm sleepy and tired, nights! (:
shall update last week photos tmr.

2008-02-26T00:06:00.001+08:00

i feel like drinking again,
randomly hearing songs now,
and i got hook on to this song again.
never hear this for like soooooooo long,
say my name by destiny child.
whenever i hear this song,
i dont know why but i will feel weird in me.
i dont know how t explain.

anyway, play basketball today at 418,
it was damn fun tday.
i sweat like a pig today ok.
jump and run like idiotic monkey.
home after dinner,
study with amanda at my house.
maths common test tmr,
i think i will just fail ok!
basketball court after exam! (:
gonna play till my whole bodyache.
the feeling is damn shiok ok!

i think i'm really addicted t the song,
feeling emo and weird when i hear this song,
it makes me stare in space, something is wrong seriously.

i realise i tend to think alot about things.
i think i'm crazy ok, haha!
nothing also wanna think, tsk, crazy.
i dont even know what i want now, or whatever.
studying now, dont wanna think so much also, bye.
thinking of setting my blog private soon.

imissyou.

2008-02-22T14:30:00.000+08:00

feeling so stressed up, fucked up, cb.
speechless, arrrrrrrghhhhhhhhhhhh.
serious mood swing now.

2008-02-18T20:30:00.001+08:00

seriously, my new hair cut look like cock ok.
everyone was so excited to style my hair in school.
went 418 after school,
alot of things happen today, dont bother saying already.
exams are coming........ die.
studying tmr! (:

gonna walk the dog with my cousin soon.
so bored at home now,
had good food for dinner just now.
dad not going for his lesson,
i'm stoning at them now,
watching them eat some jelly thing.
alright, i'm bored kkkkkkkk.
i wanna go out!

things change fast, very fast.
i miss the touch of your hand, and everything.
the time when you lie on my shoulder, everything.
i wanna see you soon.
i miss you. (:

2008-02-17T22:34:00.002+08:00

photos over the pass few days.

i wanna drink drink drink.
exams coming soon, one more week.
so gonna study like a fucking nerd.
valentines day was fine this year,
don't even wanna celebrate,
cause everyday is valentine's day (:
shag this few days,
i'm going crazy soon.
i don't know what to do,
i'm like so damn fucking confused now.

i have fallen,
iloveyou.

2008-02-14T00:20:00.001+08:00

visiting with samantha & company on monday,
went to philana hse, eat pizza, took photos,
drink at town park, home.
went to white sands with amanda, bella, siyun, zoey.
eat, chill at the library,
went to 418 and gamble.
lossing at first, won back in the end.
slack under amanda's block with her,
talk, smoke, made a deal.
she made a deal with me that time,
saying that i can't get attach this year,
so i made a deal with her saying that,
if she attach this yr, then must owe me things also.
so if either one of us break our promise,
must give 500 bucks t the winner, hook pinkies already. (:
tampines mall after school,
met zhilin at whitesands at night,
10 plus meet amanda and smoke, update a little.
tmr is valentines day, boring, no date.
going out with amanda they all t chill.
singlehood rocks seriously.
the roses are damn fucking expensive ok.
gonna sleep soon, nights. (:
gonna upload photos tmr.

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY! (:

yes, i love you.
you fondle with my heart every second.
absence makes a heart fondle,
yes,i miss you.
i get this weird feeling whenever you come near me.
happy valentine(:

2008-02-09T19:59:00.000+08:00

i'm quite bored with life nowadays,
everyday is like the same,
no new excitement, nothing.
SO BORING EVERYDAY.
i need entertainment.

family at my place now for dinnner, so bored.
i wanna go out, but dont know where t go.
DXO got party today, but i dont like t go for straight parties.
lazy to go tentrics today, ytd went already.
was damn tipsy yesterday, haha.
don't know where to go later, waiting for amanda t come back from her granny's place.
i'm very bored now! i wanna gamble!
rotting to death, dying of boredness now, bye.

2008-02-08T16:02:00.001+08:00

Chinese New Year yesterday, damn fun!
went to lydia's house at night for stayover
took loads of stupid and retarded photo with her photo booth thing.
lazy t blog, let the photos do the talking.
amanda & me look like couple, damn funny.
lydia and peixian was practically ignoring us, haha! (:
those people who don't know me and amanda will think that she's my gf ok, incest.
she is my stupid cousin! i love my family! we're retarded! (:

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! (:

2008-02-06T23:16:00.000+08:00

my creations; me and amanda's hand(:

iloveyou; baobei & me(:

THANK YOU BAOBEI!
amanda ku treat me and bella to sakae sushi ytd(:
ytd went to school, but left halfway.
reach home and sleep like a pig.
woke up at about 6plus, amanda ask whether i wanna go tm with her and bella. i say i don't want, so met her downstairs for awhile.
in the end, she tempt with me with food. so i went home, change and headed to white sands, met bella, go tm and eat sakae.
took photos again. enjoy myself with my two loveable sister! (:
after eating, walk around to buy bella's things.
went back to pasir ris, i blast amanda's mp3, played trance, damn fucking loud ok.
went to slack at playground, walk home at about 10plus.
send amanda home, then i walk home alone, not going school tmr!! (:
once again, thank you amanda baobei! (:
dinner just now at granny's house.
damn fucking full just now, but i'm hungry once again. gonna cook maggie mee later, sister staying over today!
bro playing com, mum & sis watching tv, dad slping like a pig.
mr need to wake up by9, it will be a long day tmr, tired!
tmr will be different, grandpa gone, its weird.
new year wouldn't be the same anymore, sigh.
i wanna tattoo his name or initials, but, i dont know.
i miss my grandpa, NCK.

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR EVERYONE! (:

sakae with my sisters(:

2008-01-31T23:43:00.000+08:00

hazel nanny

darius(:

michele and me(:

my retarded dog ; fluffy(:

kaven & zenn, i miss you bro.

szekuan love. i miss you! (:

stupid alicia anthonette tan.

xinyi the potato.

me and weizhen(:

me and amanda! thanks baobei for always being here for me. (:

sisters(:

i love my sister! isabella tina tan! (:

i'm just bored, thats why!
goodnight.

2008-01-31T22:17:00.000+08:00

there's alot of trouble today,
feel so sick today,
didnt manage to finish my food during recess,
cause of some trouble.
felt hungry thru out the day.
end school, went to settle those trouble,
home sweet home after that.
bathe, changed, lie on my bed and stone for a moment.
sleep like a pig till 6 plus.
eat, watch tv, play com.
found out alot of things,
met amanda for awhile downstairs my block with fluffly.
talk talk talk, went hm after that.
play com, play psp, so bored!
hmm, thinking about things now.
feeling & thinking about alot of thing now, feel like fuck.

dont judge a book by its cover,
being so innocent and everything,
everything was a lie.
i felt so cheated, and everything was like shit.
you made us see thru you and everything.
if you did treat me as a friend you wouldn't mind all these shit.
are you like guilty or what, that's why you stop all these.
it's hard to understand you, whatever alright.
i know things wouldn't be the same anymore,
i still treat you like a friend, but it's you who ruin it.
forget it, contact me when you want too.
it wouldn't be the same anymore, i knew it myself.
everything is making sense now,
the picture is becoming clearer and clearer.
you jolly well know what is happening,
so don't fucking push everything to me ok.

fuck you, lier.
don't ever let me see you this period of time.
don't make me hate you.

2008-01-28T21:34:00.000+08:00

this is drawn by sherilyn the ass.
she say it's me & it's cute.
but i think it look damn cock,
the pants is like transparent? can see my legs.
the top is also transparent and it's so short till can see my waist,
it makes me look so sexy man!
i look so botak, the drawing SUCKS!
but, i shall be nice and post it here. haha! (:
thanks sherilyn! for still being here for me after all these things!
you're greatly appreciated. :D
p.s. can draw a nicer drawing of me? haha!

2008-01-28T20:50:00.000+08:00

school in the morning,
lessons were fine.
after school, things happened.
went home to change,
me & amanda met bella at condo.
then we sit there and talk cock, sing song.
took alot of stupid photos, the funniest was me & bella photos.
we seriously look like couple ok.
we're not together ok! haha!
amanda's father fetch me home, thanks uncle! (:
home alone now, talk to jabez online now.
i'm feeling so bored.
i rather be alone, no more problems.
must leave house early to meet amanda tmr.
bye.

2008-01-27T18:38:00.000+08:00

didn't blog for a few days,
busy with school & everything.

THURSDAY
went to downtown after school,
with amanda & dorcas.
saw jeremy & co.
andrew and co. was there too.
had fun, laugh from 4plus till 9 plus.
they were disturbing anan, my metta gf.
she was dancing pole dance, shaking her ass.
doing stupid things at the field.
went home at 10 plus with my cousin, amanda.

FRIDAY
school school school,
went home to change after school.
met dorcas and amanda at amanda's block downstairs.
went down to tampines starbucks.
saw samantha & philana.
amanda got fine for cig.
sit at starbucks and talk crap till 7 plus.
left for weizhen bbq, when we reached, not much people there yet.
sit till 8plus 9, i went to maryann & kimberly's chalet.
saw denise, nick & fish, thought i will be the odd one out.
denise left, me fish & nick stand there & burn fats.
whenever we cook the chicken, maryann will steal it from us.
finally we manage to get hold of the food.
i went out to meet phebe they all.
saw miss shaheeda, my form teacher.
talk till 1145pm, maryann keep asking me to go back to chalet.
went back, left kimberly, one guy(kim's friend), maryann, kaevis, fel & three more girls.
bbq all those food left, fel keep eating & dont do any work.
suddenly fel say something damn funny about kimberly, her teeth. HAHA!
then everyone started laughing.
kimberly don't dare to open her mouth. haha.
i wanted to go home after i finish my cig,
but fal & kaevis keep asking me t stay.
all retreat t the room at 1plus.
watch DVD, two horror show.
everyone slept at 5plus.
i was like a maid, didnt really sleep properly.
keep covering blanket for people, cause damn cold.
left chalet at 12, then went out.
went to granny hse to stayover.

SUNDAY
stay at granny's place with amanda only.
talk talk talk talk.
came home in the afternoon.
paint the house with my dad & bro, mum wipe floor. damn fun!
got paint all over me
finally change bedsheet and everything.
damn tired today!
gonna have a good rest later at night.
there's school tmr!! SHIOK! (:
waiting for my dad to get ready, DINNER! i'm damn hungry now.

i dont know what's wrong with you.
whatever i do now, in your eyes it's all wrong.
no trust then dont bother asking me stuff.
cause there's no point in answering.
when i answer you, you will say bullshit or whatever.
whenever you msg me, it's to argue with me.
you left me speechless.
i say before already, stop pushing all the blame on me.
because it can't be that i'm fully wrong, it's half half.
if you wanna keep talking about what has past,
it will just cause us to argue, i'm sick & tired of it.

2008-01-22T23:06:00.000+08:00

school as usually, never take PE.
considering whether i should change chinese class.
assembly, dance.
amanda not in school today.
home to change, quarrel on the phone.
change of plans, went to central to eat with amanda.
reach there, saw eric, james they all at coffee express.
alicia came, then went to 418.
alicia went home, me and amanda walk to 418.
some fight thing, then wanted to play ball but lazy.
phebe, philene came down.
very long never hang out with them already, (:
yingying came, then talk awhile.
me and amanda left 418 at 6.
sat under her block & talk.
reach home at 7, wait for mum & dad to come home.
went to tampines mall at 8pm.
dad bought PSP, went to eat at genki sushi.
damn fucking full after that.
went t level one to walk around, it was already 9, shops all about to close already.
he bought a shoe which cost 40 plus,
mum bought me a berms which cost about 50plus, it look damn plain, yet so ex.
wanted t carry on shopping, but shops all closing.
so went home, talk crap on the car all the way home.
school tmr, boring.

i know i'm gay, but there's no need to announce to the whole world.
i hate the way you say and do things now.
it's my mouth, i wanna say what, nothing to do with you.
i wanna talk, scold or whatever, it's not your business.
when you got others, we're nothing at all.
the sight of you just turn me off.
know your limits can not.
you might do that to others, i dont give a damn.
BUT not me please. i'm different.
i seriously don't give a damn about you anymore.
i have my own freedom too ok.

& alicia, i got nothing to say but sorry.

2008-01-21T23:03:00.000+08:00

woke up at 545am today,
damn fucking early ok.
left house at around 645, met amanda & bella.
smoke & talk crap at the stairs.
went to school, they dont allow guys to wear colour t-shirt inside now.
cause they catching people with tattoo now, so stupid.
class was fine today, mother tongue was the BEST!
in mother tongue, me, samantha, zoey, julius & shengyang keep talking.
then we keep saying teacher, cause sam, julius & shengyang going another class on thursday.
then left me & zoey in mother tongue class, it will be damn boring ok.
then irritate teacher like nobody's business.
she send the five of us out of the class & say we can only come in after 5 mins.
she is stupid & dumb seriously.
english nothing much.
bella & amanda left school halfway today.
bella really sick, amanda stomache. haha.
after school got stupid trouble, waste of my bloody time.
went home to change, meet amanda outside polyclinic.
OH! at the atm machine there, me & her smoking then we saw my POA teacher.
she call my name damn loud. fuck! amanda keep saying nothing will happen.
go eat then i went to my granny house after that.
fall asleep while talking to her halfway.
woke up at 830, mum say leave early.
went 201 to pick my dad up from his don't know lesson at the CC.
home to catch the last episode of the drama on channel 8.
in the end, me & my mum was like wtf, cause the ending sucks!
use com now, then off to bed.
i think i'm gonna take physics re-test on thursday already. FAIL!
i'm a F9 student, haha!
i need cig!

things changed & i know it myself.
the problem lies on me & i know too.
i don't know what's wrong with me,
all i can say now is sorry.

2008-01-20T19:56:00.000+08:00

FRIDAY
went to school, time passed so fast.
PE teacher need to go for meeting, free period.
recess ; two periods of english & home sweet home!
went home to change, blah blah blah.
disturb jan like crazy.
met amanda, alicia & isabella, left for bugis at about 4.
reached there, fag & walk around.
went to find rachel (:
didnt see her for a very long time already.
talked ; got slap by her accidentally & got pinched. haha.
went to the second floor, walked around.
tired, eat at bugis cafe.
desmond thien & co. came, say hi & bye.
bella bought her things, left for tampines.
walked a little, bella left, me amanda alicia headed to starbucks.
sit down, fag & talk crap.
went back to pasir ris, alicia meet cindial & friends.
me & amanda left for town park to eat.
home.

SATURDAY
OUT.
had a good time.
talked to sister on the phone at night.
family going crazy again, quarrels & bigger arguements.
they're brothers & sisters, yet they are like killing each other.
i just dont seem to understand what my fourth auntie is thinking.
she is like a crazy woman,
maybe like what my sister say, she has split personality.
she is seriously outta her mind already.
it's hard to understand somethings.

WANNA GO HAJI LANE SOON.
got interviewed by some students, in CHINESE!
they asked for help, so ya.
it was damn funny.

SUNDAY
went to my grandma hse today in the afternoon, met my sister there.
aunties came, me & sis left at 6.
went to my father's side granny hse for dinner.
damn tired now.
was replying comments on friendster, playing facebook & blogging.
i'm damn bored now! there's school tmr.
& there's physics test, must revise later.
keep thinking that i'll fail my N's this year, sigh.
& i must stay home more often now.
my mum look depress & sad nowadays.
seeing her like this makes me sad too.

sudden craving for seafood! (:

2008-01-17T21:34:00.001+08:00

I'M SERIOUSLY DAMN BORED!
went to school today, woke up at 615am.
was feeling damn tired today.
met amanda, smoke, went off to school.
julius and zoey didnt got t school.
time seem to pass damn fast when i'm in school.
copying of notes and paying attention in class.
N'levels this year, better buck up.
after school, went home to change.
met up amanda & bella,
off to central to buy cig, eat & we made our way to white sands.
met alicia, study.
me and amanda walk to central, bought food & went home.
stonning in front of the com now.
watching american idol, laughing my ass off at the contestants.
tmr going out after school with bella & co.
sleeping soon...............

i miss you.
i miss everything about you.
just rmb that i still love you.

2008-01-16T23:20:00.000+08:00

hi people, gonna reopen my blog.
will update when i feel like it, haha.
these few day, alot of things happened.
grandpa passed away; seriously i learn loads of things after the funeral.
i seriously can write a script for my family,
some people will understand what i'm saying.
anyway, i have seen the different side of people ard me,
some people are not as simple as you think they are.
i don't need alot of close friends with me,
all i need is one or two close friends that will listen to my problems,
having loads of good & close friends will make myself even more stress with life.
something is wrong with me nowadays; attitude problem.
i can't control my attitude or temper now.
gonna sleep soon, there's school tmr.
goodnight.

imissyou(:

2007-07-03T00:39:00.000+08:00

currently, i dont know what am i to do alrdy.
everybody around me is going crazy
thus,making me mad too.
relationship ok.
friends ; fuck
family ; fuck

other then baby, i dont know who else i can care for.
everyone makes me dont feel like caring anymore.
cause is like, i try all my best to advice that person
yet in the end the same thing happen over & over again
making me dont wanna care anymore.

today i decided to blog after such a long time.
wanting to tell friends what i feel here.

swan brother,
i seriously dont know what's wrong with you now.
you really changed to another person alrdy.
i feel like a stranger to you now.
i miss the times when we two have fun everywhere we go.
the time we pick the stupis merlion up.
& is like each time i walk out of my school
i will think of the times when you & mich wait for me outside school.
where's the clique which we use to have.
we are all so scattered now.
its not wrong to have new friends,
but sometimes dont over do things.
did you ever think whether you're really happy with them.
but just be alert of the people ard you.
they might not be like what you think they are.
backstabbers or blah blah blah.
i hope you can be yourself,
the real swan. [:
take care. im always here for you.
i promise.

cyn,
i dont really have much to say to you.
but i just hope that you mean everything you say.
cause you're really part of the reason why i dont feel like caring alrdy.
i keep telling you this & that.
giving you advices & stuffs.
you gave us your promise in the end the same things.
so it made me think hard
& i really dont wanna be a fool alrdy.
cause things these days are driving me crazy.
know your own limits when you're with HER.
you know that you cant control your feelings.
but know how to control.
mean what you say or i will really give up on you & HER d matter alrdy.

baobei,
im angry , im hot ,
wanting to beat her up.
but something stops me inside.
its you, i dont want cause of that fucker then we argue.
just cheer up ok.
what i say also no use one lah.
just hope you can listen to me once.
its not worth crying over that fucker.
its worthless, i rather you save the tears
& cry for me when i die.
it will be even more worth it.
just concentrate on your studies now ok!
i dotn wanna see any of us retain again.
its a important year for us ok!
we must graduate tgt ok.
cheer up alrdy.
dont smoke & drink so much alrdy.
i love you ok!
chun,bella,mich,everyone of us love you!
you dont need that person to love you.
we'll always be here for you.
especially me!

shannon,
think thru what you really want.
studies more important.
dont forget what i told you that time ok.
im always here. [:

family sucks,
they make me dont feel like going home.
it seriously sucks.

i dont know la.
i wanna study hard & when my studies are stable.
i wanna go find outside team & play netball.
might be taking piano lessons again.
do what i wanna do.
play hard & study hard.

everybody take care.[:
study hard.

baby,iloveyou<3
you're all i need [:

2007-02-21T22:32:00.000+08:00

on sunday wake up early in the morning
then go granny hse visit & take angbao! haha
then proceed to tanah merah ahma hse.
then went to mum's uncle hse to bai nian.
then see all their BIG BIG hse i oso want.
then on the care hear mum & dad telling us bout mum's side of family de stry.
my jie,kor were laughing like mad monkeys in the car.
then went to payalebar ahma hse again.
slack there then was crapping with my cousin.
gosh. thats funny lah.
then went to mum's side d uncle hse.
suspose to stay over at lydia jie hse with amanda & peixian jie
in the end changed my mind.
as mum was not feeling to well.
then after that went home sleep like pig like that.
counted my angbaos ; $ 700+
then fall asleep.

SUNDAY
happily sleeping till 10plus.
then my father's office people come visiting
oh gosh!
they sing till my house gonna crash!
& worst of all wake me up from my beauty sleep!
so i on my lappy & blast the music damn loud.
then aunties came.
went to change & bout 3plus.
go to my mum's auntie hse!
her hse is so BIG can.
got gym,swimming pool & mini cinema & many many more.
oh man, i want a house like this!
she is so fucking rich.
thats what i call a rich taitai.
& her daughter;my xiaoyi
is the singapore richest girl. hees.
then i was like guessing how much is the electrical bill.
we guess 2000+ plus.
haha. then went to adrian kor hse.
played some stupid money game.
then i left half way & go home.
changed into nice nice clothes.
then went to baby's auntie hse at hougang.
then gamble there.
those aunties are fun!
haha!
play till 1am like that.
then go baby hse stay.
suspose to go herstory to club.
then i lazy so sleep.

next day go meet swan & cyn then go walk walk at bugis.
meet amanda & bella.
sit & talk for awhile.
then me baby , swan & cyn go eat.
then we went to walk ard looking for my shirt.
then still cant find.
decided to go far east & see whether shops are open.
in the end huge disappointment.
dont have any shops open.
then we decided to go geylang.
see ALOT ALOT OF THINGS THERE!
learn new things.
experience new things.
me & swan kena touched! haha!
oh gosh!
those girls are like......
have big boobs one,tall,short,different race & colour. LOL!
then see those different colours,race & country guys there! DIFFERENT AGE TOO!
haha! open eyes BIG BIG ytd man
then baby & cyn say next time go desker road.
is ladies come find me&swan. haha! oh gosh.
i cant imagine it & dont want to think of it.

today is a boring day!
argued again.
but ok again, (:

baby,iloveyou! <3
i love my silly baby girl always.
sweetheart, i will make you melt in my mouth.

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR PEEPS! (:

2007-02-17T21:13:00.000+08:00

ytd alot of things happened.
anyway ya.
i blog for one purpose today.
i shall start my lecture now.

ytd i see baobei smoking so much.
the both of us sitting at the back alley of bugis street.
she smoking & crying her heart out to me.
left me stranded there & dont know what to do.
looking at her cry & her saying she is so happy makes me so useless.
i felt like crying too.
what the fuck is everybody doing.
claim to be sisters.
when they needed baobei.
she was there for them
but when she need them who was there.
ytd i was there.
i dont mean to say i was there so im so wonderful.
i blamed myself too.
all of us are like taking baobei for granted.
some neglect her when they got others.
some break their promises.
some just take things for granted.
when they have bfs with them or other friends then throw her aside.
but when they need help,got problems.
baobei try all means to help.
what time of friends or sisters is this.
still got loads to say bout them.
but forget it.
im just pissed too see baobei like this.
hope you all understand.

baobei.
if you got anything please tell me.
i will try to help you like how you always help me
dont bother bout anything.
just come & find me.
leave me a msg & i will get back to you.
dont make me so worry for you by keeping things all to yourself.
dont keep things to yourself.
no more yanfen.
got me.
im your friend,your baobei for a reason.
im always here for you.
i promise.
i have never once take you for granted.
& i try all ways to help you in your problems.
ytd all i could do was lend you a listening ear.
i know you couldnt take it anymore ytd.
im sorry if i ever neglect you or take you for granted.
baobei. please take care.

everybody changed alot.
how i wish time can turn back to the times when its just us alone.
i miss the times when all of us hang out till late at night.
with no problems & troubles.
just fag & talk.
everybody changed.
sighs. ):

2007-02-12T00:10:00.000+08:00

im so pissed off now.
by some spammer in my baby's blog!
fuck that fucking spammer alrights.
im so angry now can.
im like so gonna fuck that person upside down can.
kao pei. make me angry only.
& that stupid baby can still laugh.
im so angry & she is happily laughing.

those who read my blog please go link to my baby's blog & scold that dots back.
im so pissed off.
fucking bitch.
she is such a fucking bitch who has no class,no brains!!
ROAR!! >:(

KAVEN TAN IS PISSED OFF!!
she scold me bitch & say my baby has no taste means say i not good looking can! idiot piece of shit!!

2007-02-11T22:23:00.000+08:00

friday i stay in school till 2plus.
weizhen they all come back to school to take their results.
i was sitting with angela,cheryl,dorcas & lijie they all.
then i left school & went home to bathe.
mummy was at home when i reached.
cheryl called me & ask to meet up later to return the comics.
then i bathe & changed.
went to central to buy stuffs for baby & her friends.
i saw dorcas so i call her.
then after that i went shop & save to buy the things.
then went to bubbletea shop there to slack.
treat angela & cheryl fries & bubbletea.
sit there & slack.
saw marcus & samuel.
chatted for a while & stupid lijie came.
walk off with lijie to 7-11.
i was carrying a big bag of food.
haha! like im going for food feast.
then gave lijie a lift to westplaza there
then i made my way down to baby's camp
at lorong low koon there.
the place is like so quiet.
then spent some time with baby there.
time for me to go alrdy.
BIG HUGS & GOODBYE KISSES.
didnt bare to go.
but i had no choice.
went to downtown to meet weizhen,xueyen,val,jack&edison.
then played pool.
keep winning them. haha.
went to get a drink & saw wenfang they all.
talked & left for pool.
weizhen bought me bubbletea.
as i was coughing like nobody's business.
then left to central to eat.
went playground to slack.
cabbed home.
bathe & call baby.
and i was off to bed.

ytd cab down to tp to fetch baby.
then gave her a surprise.
cab to pasir ris ikea.
but she found out in the end.
not fun!
walked around ikea.
didnt really have much things.
was discussing what to have in our hse.
so funny lah.
then went home.
mummy & daddy brought us out.
daddy went sim lim square while mummy me & baby went OG
i went shopping for new year clothes.
bought a tube dress for first day. eeeeeyerrrr. no choice.
then bought a polo tee & a long pants.
bought a bag & shoes.
spend bout 170++ bah.
baby was laughing at me when i was trying on the dress. eeeeekkk!
then went for dinner.
eat till damn full.
then went home.
reached home at bout 11plus.
had fun today.
happy family (:
then watch dvd with baby.
then went to bed.

had spring cleaning today.
woke up at 1plus.
eat chicken rice.
then packed my table & change bed sheets.
sleep again at 3plus till5plus.
got woken up by mummy's stupid vacumm cleaner.
so noisy can! haha!
then me & baby went to buy dinner for mummy & daddy.
eat & slack in the room.
im baby's pui pui! haha!
then baby must leave for chinatown to meet her mum.
she is going to meet godma.
i want to go too! but tmr got school.
then gave her a tight hug & finally i decided to let her go.
haha! how i wish i can lock her up today.
but i cant.
there's school tmr.

im thinking what to do on valentines day with my baby.
thinking what to give her.
STRESS!! haha!
im waiting for her to go home.
so bored.
currently hearin songs.
msging my nipple piercing. & my baby girl.

baby,iloveyou.
dont leave me.
i cant live without you.
i really need you in my life.
im really serious bout you.
im not playing or waht now.
do you know that you got me so crazy over you now.
im learning how to cherish you now.
trying so hard to treat you good.
trying so hard to make you feel loved.
trying so hard to give you what you want.
all i want in return is your heart & love.
im all yours for valentines.
im your forever.
say you really love me.

I LOVE MICHELE EE!! <3

2007-02-06T23:56:00.000+08:00

me & baby. (: & my chicken wing! haha.

you're the only reason why im so retarded & of cus , CUTE! handsome & adorable (:

retarded me in baby's uniform ; CHIJ TP sec. typical bung in a girls school. tsk.

stupid monkey with lollipop!

baby , fall into my arms now & say you love me.
brothers for life. i love my brother zenn! *tongues out* nobody can get her away from me! she's mine!
*SMOOCHES* iloveyou. <3>

me & baby in each other's school uniform.

my baby girl in my uniform. she looks so mature can. OLD! HAHA! xD

2007-02-06T23:23:00.000+08:00

today in school so bored can!
then after school saw shihui.
then she say got people say her.
so tmr if i m free im gonna find that girl & talk to her.
complicated life.
then anyway,
was playing a fool with lijie & marcus & dorcas.
then dorcas pei me go home.
i changed & left hse.
went white sands to see things.
then after that i left for town.

met hazel,clara&melvin for lunch.
not going for the movie with them
so hazel call nigel to go instead.
in the end,
only clara & melvin watch movie.
then i left for fareast.
meet swan,cyn & baby.
had a little arguement with her.
she was angry & so am i.
but in the end we were fine.
always like this!haha!

then went to ang mo kio to eat steamboat.
ten dollar for one person.
eat till damn full.
then cab home with baby.
baby took a cab home after sending me.
reached home took a bathe & call daddy.
he just touched down to singapore. yays!

blogging now & later going to talk to stupid baby.
haha!
we were competing on msn.
see who have the nicest msn nick.
hers was : MICHELE!&! YOU'RE SO CUTE SO WILL YOU COME TO ME<3
then her personal msg was: MELTINMYFINGERS &&& YOU WILL NEVER LEAVE
mine was: KAVEN!&! YOU'RE SO SEXY & HOT SO WILL YOU COME TO ME<3
personal msg: im so gonna turn you on & you're to melt in my mouth. you're mine forever.
we keep changing just now.
& i think we decided to leave it this way.
im gonna blog & off the com alrdy.
after talking to baby is time for ZzzZZzzz land!
off the bed! weeeeeees*
bye peeps! (:

baby,iloveyou. <3

random: i miss baobei (:

2007-02-05T00:59:00.000+08:00

baby , i love you <3
i miss you.
you taught me the meaning of love ; true love.
dont ever leave me.

when out with swan,cyn & mich on saturday!
i miss the fun we had.
finally me & swan ok alrdy.
me & mich go down ang mo kio to meet swan & cyn.
then me & swan went to find binder!
my binder is getting loose.
we bought 2 each.

then we decided to go queensway shopping center
to find swan's sports bra!
then we cab down.
me & bird spilt the fare.
then talked happily in the taxi.
we were saying that mich & cyn run after the cab
since we two are paying!
haha!

reached there & we went to eat laksa.
then went to find sports bra.
then cant find the cheaper ones.
haha!
then we decided to go IKEA.
oh oh oh!
saw lijie & her dad at 3 or 4th floor.
got quite a shock can!
she got a shock too!
then we left for IKEA!
went to walk around.
then i bought the stupid snake thingy for $2
then went to eat the meatball & chicken wing.

left at 9plus.
then went to find satay for mummy to eat.
then walk so far then finally found it.
bought the things.
& cab home.
the four of us watch tv till 3am in the morning.
watching DVD. i forget what show.
damn funny can.

shall stop here first.
update soon ok!
tmr still got school!
night peeps! :D

iloveyou <3

2007-01-23T13:51:00.000+08:00

shall update my blog alittle. (:
starting from 19 of jan.

19thof jan
went home to change after school.
then went to meet amanda at her house there.
then we took a bus to pasir ris mrt
to meet stupid isabella.
they wanted to buy cigarette.
then i tell them i try to buy.
see whether can get pass not.
then they give me the money to try.
then the stupid uncle say cant
cause i will get him in trouble!
wahlau! do i look so young can!
isabella manage to pass lah.
then they were happily laughing at me like nobody's business.

isabella was like so crazy on the mrt.
& they were asking me to blast my music
cause on the another side of the mrt the guy oso blasting his music.
poor fone of mine.
reached town.
then shopped around
while waiting for mich to come.
bought a new earring as my 2 earring dropped in school. DAMN!
then eat chippy's.
by the time baby came down , they need to go alrdy.
then bid them bye bye.
then me & baby went down to dont know where.
cant find the clothes i want.
so we cab down to bugis
as i was very lazy.

went to walk around bugis street.
saw yuhao & one girl.
talking bout clubbing thing.
then me & baby went SHOPPING!
bought this 2 top of baby from my friend's shop.
i bought this white shirt from dont knw waht shop for 15bucks.
& one i dont know how to say shirt from rebirth for 39.90? should be.
then met jade
& we went down to hougang for dinner.
eat crab & alot of things.
hahahaha! we all eat till damn full.
then cab home.

20th of jan
went clubbing at DXO with baby,xinyi,varron,cc,tang,wk&their friend.
reached there at bout 8pm.
then saw kuan.
she go with her friends.
tried finding ID for her.
saw nat & gang. HAHA!
tried finding a ID for myself too.
keith dont look like me.
none looked like.
lend pet's ID
looked alike in some way.
so bought tix from shannon.
but the queue was damn fucking long can!
then baby say the ID is blurred.
so dont tink can go in de.
then we decided to transfer chop.
then yupps! manage to transfer.
but the 2 is inverted.SHIT.
took the risk.
i tried to go in.
then the bouncer was talking to some poeple.
then i just walk in like this.
WEEEEEEEEEES*
i manage to get in.

took some photos while waiting for the dance floor to be open.
12plus.
dance floor is opened!! (:
the starting was BORING!!
all hip hop no R&B.
then went R&B was played.
everyone went HIGH!
was dancing with mich & xinyi.
dont know why.
but the atmosphere there was weird.
kinda of boring on that day.
xinyi & mich was happily competing with others.
went back at 3plus like that.
then xinyi & mich keep saying last song
then in the end continue dancing.
then finally they decided to go.
went to find varron & friends.
then me & baby cab home.
slept at 7plus. TIRED!! ROARR!

then we woke up at 1 or 2 plus in the afternoon.
then bout 6plus we went for dinner opposite baby's hse.
go eat crab again.
haha! eat till full full then go home.

ytd go school so boring can!
was like practically slacking in class lah!
CD teacher never come.
then after school got pissed off.
dont wish to say.
disappointed.
then after school go out meet justine with lijie.
then lijie left to meet her baby.
then blahblahblah.
baby came down at night to do homework with me.
broke down cause talked bout some stuffs.

today sick never go school.
going see doctor soon.
boring.
argued with baby.
dont knw lah.

to her:
feeling so invisible to you now.
im like not your sister anymore.
you dont seem to need me by you.
all you need is others & not me.
what for i get myself so worried
when i heard that you cry.
i rushed down to the couselling room cause of you.
4 years of sister.
you tell baobei,ken,sichun,dorcas or whosoever.
but waht bout me.
am i really so forgettable to you now.
all you need is him is it?
asking me not to find him trouble.
i dont see a point of me finding him.
cause its not business anymore.
cause you didnt tell me anything.
i will just take it as i dont know anything.
do whatever you want.
tell me if you want to.
treat me like a sister.
dont want then forget it.
4years of friendship.
turing so sour now.
feeling so not needed in this clique.
everybody keep things to themselves.
what can i do to help.
sighs.
i dont wanna lost this friendship with them.
break down each time i think bout this matter.
am i a useless friend?

2007-01-20T16:15:00.000+08:00

HELLO BABY C:
i'm invading your blog without you knowing.
hahahahah
who ask you leave me all alone go meet your friend
later you late for dxo i dont help you get in then you know
:D
anyways,
thanks for showering me with so much love ytd :DDD
i wanted the earing and braclet and all
but i didnt want you to spent so much money
thanks for the two tops :))
and dinner was great!
i love the CRAB!!!!
later you better dont anyhow hook other girls

ILOVEYOU!

p.s can you dont snore so loud next time
heheheheh

-MICHELE <333

2007-01-18T19:08:00.000+08:00

HELLOOOO!!
i today never go school
cause i sick.
down with fever & flu & slight cough
being lyin down on my bed for a long time.
feeling like some handicap lah! HAHA.
was not feeling very well at first.
but felt better after eating medicine &
felt happier.
i think im mad now.
im so bored now can!
watching tv. project superstar2.
just now watching the 7pm show.
im bored now!!ROAR!

SAT HURRY COME LEHS!! HAHA!
SOFT AT DXO!! :D
tmr going out to buy clothes.
going shopping with mich & xinyi & i tink verron bahs.
got one whole day tmr to shop till we drop.
but still.... i hate shopping!! HAHAHA!
tmr going to school.
the thought of school give me shivers! haha!
but tmr end at 1230pm! so nvm!! haha!
end here!
cant wait for saturday to come! (:

i love you baby. <3

2007-01-16T13:38:00.000+08:00

me & my baobei <3>
thanks for always being there for me.
love you! (:
nobody can ever break our friendship up.

2007-01-16T11:22:00.000+08:00

im sorry for all these things.
i didnt mean for things to be like this.
hate me for you want.
im sorry.

2007-01-14T23:39:00.000+08:00

fuck everything ok.
what goes around comes around.
my life is ruined.
my heart is broken.
im lost in my own world.
i slit my wrist & now im drowning in my own blood
& tears.
all the fucking sad songs are stuck in my head now.
& im crying non-stop.
hearing the song.. chong lai..
& im dying now.
i dont even know what the fuck is wrong with me.
do you love me?
do you need me?
do you even want me?
i love you more then anything else.
im willing to give up everything for you.
im willing to waiting for you.
but are you giving me a chance?
im so stress now.
all i can do now is to torture myself.
i cant feel pain at all.
pain to me now is nothing.
i need you by my side.
dont ever leave me alone please.
baby!
im crying all my tears out now for you.
please dont say you dont love me anymore.
please dont say you dont miss me.
please dont say you dont need me.
i really need you.
everything is crashing on me now.
the whole world can just jolly well turn their backs on me now.
i dont give a fucking damn anymore.
everybody just take good care of themselves
then everything will be fine.
i dont see a point in living anymore if you are outta my life.
i must really thanks baobei,lijie,elesia&dorcas who're always here for me since last time.

i have never once been a good gf to anyone.
i have never treated anyone of my gf good.
im always a flirt to everybody.
im always a lier forever.
i can never be trusted.

KAVEN TAN IS ON THE VERGE OF DYING.
LEAVE ME ALONE PLEASE.
IS THERE REALLY SUCH THING AS TRUE LOVE?
CAN SOMEONE PLEASE SHOW ME THAT?
ROARRRRRRRR! -CRIES-

2007-01-12T15:11:00.000+08:00

i now at amanda hse.
come take stupid umbrella.
cause its raining damn fucking heavy.
my fucking com spoilt.
can use msn but cant use internet.
damn sian la!
everyday since school reopen i have been studying & doing my work.
sighs.
& this few days keep raining.
keep getting stuck in school with lijie.
lessons are boring!!!!!! ROAR!!
i understand everything.
& that sure is boring!
but not knowing anything is boring too.
everything bout school is boring!!
& im dying at home.
my mum just simply sucks.
& she is driving me nuts.
my whole life now is so stress alright.
blog when im free.
byebye.

baby,i miss you.
iloveyou alot.
dont ever leave me.
you're my everything
& i cant live without you.
i dont wanna regret not holding you tight in my arm.
i dont wanna regret for not telling how much i love you
& how important you are to me.
loving you is the greatest thing that i can ever do in life.
i promise to love you the way you want me too.
i will walk with you till the end of time.
i will never leave you alone & throw you aside.
i need you with me.
i love you deeply. <3

2007-01-08T01:02:00.000+08:00

baby i love you. <3
baby i wanna see you now.
baby i miss you.
baby say you love me.
baby say you miss me.
baby say you need me in your life.
all i need is you.
you're my one & only baby girl.
time will change everything.
trust my love for you.
you're my everything.

i wanna pamper you.
i wanna prove to you that i've settled down.
i wanna be there for you always.
i wanna be the one for you.
i wanna stay with you
going for shopping & stuffs.
i can see our future in you.
all you need to do is assure me
that you will be with me for life.

iloveyou. <3

2007-01-07T02:32:00.000+08:00

i already explained.
its up to you to decide.

2007-01-03T23:48:00.000+08:00

today is the first day of school.
met amanda & bella in the morning.
then assembly.
sian sian sian!!
principle every year say same thing till i sian!

then sing national anthem..
then i & bella cant find our name in the class list.
in the end, ya we are at the correct class.
when the principle talk finish
she say "teacher you may go & conduct a spot check on the students"
i was like FUCK!

then the teacher walk towards me.
then i say.
"i know. i will go there myself"
then he was like saying good that you know.
then i stand up with bella.
walk to the front.
everybody's attention will be on you.
fuck it man.
everytime first day i kena.

then happily we all sit in front talking away with desmond & frends.
then the stupid azman say that those with coloured hair cant go back class.
& must call parents.
if parents cant come down to fetch
then must stay in school till school end.
i lazy to sit there & do nth.
so i call my mum with my hp in front of the teachers.
i was hiding.
cause if i was to wait for my turn to use the office fone.
it will be a long time before its my turn.

called my mum & she came down
lijie going home oso.
i went home to bathe & change.
then went down to central to meet lijie & auntie.
then me & lijie went to buy dye.
then go eat lunch
auntie went to bugis.

after that i got a surprise from someone. (:
then dye lijie hair
then i went down to clementi.
then after that went down to bishan.
weeeeeeeeeeeees*

& lastly was home sweet home!! (:
dyed my own hair.
& FUCKING HELL!!
ITS BLACK NOW CAN!!
confirm lijie laugh at me tmr.
cause i laughed at her today! haha!
weeeeeeeeeees *

later hen pack my bag for tmr.
need bring quite alot of things!
SIANS SIA!
can i dont go to school?!!
ROAR!!
KAVEN TAN KUKU HATES TO STUDY!!
& i hate the teachers too!!
hate the school rules.
& yes.
i cut my finger nails already.
its like so so so short.
then lijie say why so short
must leave a little bit.
so can scratch myself.
haha!! lame shit! (:

we didnt really get a chance to look at the juniors.
tmr me & lijie should get started
& look for good looking juniors.
& oso funny-looking & ugly juniors!
okaes, i sound very bad!
haha! BUT I LOVE IT! =D

bye peeps.
tmr still need meet amanda.
off to bed now~ tatas~ (:

babyimissyou.
babyiloveyou.
i want you to fall into my arms now.
i need to hold you tight now.
im deeply in love with you
& will always be in love with you.
nothing gonna change my love for you.
memories flowing thru my mind suddenly.
& all i see was you & me.
thinking bout the fun we had & stuff.
i wanna go walk walk with you at esplanade.
wanna go eat good food with you.
waiting for me to have cash & stuffs.
all i wanna give you is LOVE & CARE!
& of cus HAPPINESS! (:
trust my love for you alrights.
i can be romantic like how you want me to.
i will love you like how you want me to.
my love for you is true.
school reopen already so i wun have much time to spend with you.
but i will try to take time out to go out with you
& when i can make it
i will try to meet you & go out with you. (:

p.s. baby,dont bite me ever again. its painful. still got the mark there!! (:

might be going SOFT @ DXO... 20th of january..
maybe only. see how it goes.
see whose going then decide.

2007-01-01T16:12:00.000+08:00

HELLO!! (:
HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!! (:

went for countdown with mich,xinyi & zave
@ marina there.
after that walk to city hall
it was so fucking crowded.
decided to walk to cathay & not take the train.
reach cathay & met crystal.shannon.& 2 of their friend.
went to watch death note 2.
in the toilet i saw my school seniors.
sian half can.blah.

then after movie went down to macpherson
to the prata shop to meet keith.
but fucking hell it was close.
stil make me think so long what should i eat.
then in the end walked to this market.
we eat vegetarian food.
& i was so noisy there.
i was playing in the market.
when we walking back
i was dancing to the song "candy shop"
happily entertaining mich,xinyi,keith&zave.
went back to sleep.
everybody was so tired from all the walking & stuffs.
now we are all awake.
& i wanna eat fish congee!!
cause im sick & having a bad flu & sore throat.
oh mannnnn~
i hate to be sick cause it sucks.
used up alot of tissue from mich hse.
oh gosh.
my nose is dropping out soon.
& mich smash my nose today morning.
it was so painful alright!!
my cute nose get smash by her. hurmfp*
dont friend you!!~
stupid potato keep laughing & laughing ytd.
she is so stupid & easily fascinated.
no wonder is STUPID POTATO!!
HAHAHA!

got some new news from some girl.
hmmms.
i still dont really believe in love at first sight.
it might just be infactuation or maybe really love?
i dont know.
but now i dont wanna think bout so many things.
cause i still have more important things to think bout.
dont have time to entertain these people.
cause if i think or consider.
confirm i will get more stress.
& my hair will drop & my boobs will grow bigger even when i bind.
(some stupid idiot tell me)
& if i start thinking more problems will arise.
ii dont want it to happen man.
so i think i should just leave it as it is.
& just let nature takes it course.

i shouldnt be thinking so much now.
tmr going back home.
dont even wanna go back but i dont have a choice.
cause of SCHOOL!
i wanna study man.
suddenly feel like going back to school.
go school no need stress bout r/s stuff.
but need to stress bout ....
how to escape from teacher
how to run away from class & school.
how to lie to the teacher bout h/w
how to fake sick & be send home.
how to lie to mum & dad so no need go school
how to settle those stupid daiji in school
how to face those new juniors.
wahs! i now tink bout juniors.
i sure hope among the new batch of juniors
got lesbians!! (: hees.
a hot & sexy one.
or a cute looking one oso can.
NOT BUNG! is passive.
wahs. if have many many oso can. haha!
have bung oso good.
then can look at girls with me.
haha! (: im just kidding alrights.
cause no such things will happen in my stupid school
except that there will be lots of boliao daiji in school.
thats for sure.

ohhhh man~
i havent buy books.shoes.bag.& i dont know what.
a pencil box maybe?
cause i go sch with just one pen & pencil?
whatever it is.
first day of school standard..
go school with my hair coloured,
a file with one story book inside,
one pen & pencil,
untidy attire & of cus
ANKLE SOCKS!
then the school can take a new big big bag.
to fit all the socks they took from me.
whatever.
im getting bored talking bout school.

singing just now.
then 2 retards took video of me.
the retards video-ing the retard! (:
i need a hair cut so i will look handsome when i go school!
the HANDSOME OYSTER! (:

iloveyoubaby.

2006-12-28T06:11:00.000+08:00

alrights im here to blog finally.

24dec06
that day after DXO party.
i went to clarke quey to drink.
found a bar that can dance & drink.
saw kuan & my ahma.
after that waited for a few more people.
play till dont know waht time then we go eat.
then we cab home.
it was like fucking hard to find a cab there la.

25dec06
then after that sleep.
wake up & went to meet them in town.
then i was quite sad already
cause of alot of things.
then i went to walk around.
when i came back.
something happen to -----
some people will know lah.
then i went to help her.
she must like say thank you to me can!
for saving her life!! (:
quick say thank you!! HAHA!
then went to k-ster to sing & drink.
phone was like flat lah.
then i drink very fast.
was having headache lah.
alot of things happened.
went over to friend's place to stay.
two words - christmas sucks!

26dec06
went down to compass to eat.
sleep till late afternoon.
bring that stupid ass to clinic.
then i left to serangoon.
met the rest in SGH.
so ma fan can.
that stupid potato fall down can! haha!
such a large bang on the floor!
become mash potato. (:
then went down to the prata there to eat.
then cab back.
better mention stupid rambutan before she kill me.
drink coke & eat chocolate till she went mad.
crazy rambutan! (:
but i still love her!

27dec06
today alot of things happen..

today afternoon go meet baobei in town.
mich came to meet her too.
about 5plus hazel came.
went to walk around at far east.
then after awhile.
i cant tahan anymore.
so i decided to hurry settle this thing.
found a place to sit down & talk.
went to the stairs there.
me, baobei & mich & hazel.
talk for awhile.
clearing things out.
suddenly, elesia came! omg.
then she was like so straight foward towards hazel.
dont know lah.
shannon came.
after clearing the thing out.
me him & mich went to taka.
to meet keith & xinyi.
then we went to buy food
& mum mum.
xinyi was like asking mich to give her eat the stupid chicken.
then i keep bothering her asking her to eat her stupid medicine.
then she before eat medicine drink half of the water le can.
SO LOUSY! (:

then we went to cine.
the two idiots go buy their stupid cookie.
we went up to the arcade.
i play pool with this bung.
then nat & calli & vanessa were there too.
i win that bung in pool.
let that stupid nat win again.
then play the photo thingy.
cause i still got token left.
then zenn&cynthia came to the arcade there to meet mich.
things are different now. wahtever.
went down to tp.
& waited for keith.
cause he send han jin home.
then we all go eat & talk.
then slack near mich house there.
then me xinyi & mich just now talking outside bout sch life.
it was damn hilarious man.
xinyi copy that china cher talk damn funny lah! HAHA

now slacking in the room.
trying to rmb waht to blog. HAHA!
HELLOOOOOOOOOOO! (:
go fuck spider.
go pcc & die.
new words learn from keith!! (:

to you :
im sorry about today.
but i just dont want to lie to myself that you're right.
but the thing is that i dont know who to trust at all.
after hearing alot of stories.
i decided that i need to talk to you
i pluck up alot of courage to talk things out.
normally i think i'll just run away frm reality.
at least today i say things out properly
& i think if i didnt open my ears
i think i will still be living in self denial.
thinking you're right.
but till now.
i just dont know bout this matter.
you msg me just now saying
that you did tink of using me to forget bout her.
but you didnt.
that got me thinking again.
whether what you say now is true or not.
i dont know.
forget it.
anyway,it the past & today everything have come to an end.
its the end of you & me.
but , nothing even started how to end.
whatever.
if you love me that time
then you should say it out.
maybe things wun be like this.
im sorry to treat you like this now.
you left me with no choice.
now that im gonna give up
you tell me you're starting to like me.
there's no such thing as starting to like.
only have.. like or dont know.
sighs.whatever alright.
just take care of yourself.
if you still wanna be normal friends.
then up to you.
if you dont want to be anything
then forget it.
say sorry to your sister for me.
wish you good luck for your results ba.
hope you get into the school you wanan get in.
bye.
one last time - im very sorry!

to baobei & elesia :
thanks for being there for me today.
im sorry baobei.

&&&&!!
i must thanks lijie for being there for me too.
rmb to try meet me tmr k! (:
i miss my good mei mei.

to michele ee wei shan :
thanks for doing all these for me.
i will give you all the time you need.
just think bout it alrights.
you're still the only one who understands me.
the one who knows me inside out.
amanda also another one who knows me inside out.
blah blah blah.
time will decides everything.
leave it to fate alright.

iloveyoubaby.

2006-12-24T20:20:00.000+08:00

ytd afternoon went down to serangoon
suspose to meet hazel.
& yes. she is angry for some reasons.
in the end i waited downstairs her blk for half an hour.
call lijie to help me find out where is hazel.
& guess what.
she left for work already. damn!
anyway .
went down to parkway to look for her.
had dinner with her & grace.
clear the misunderstanding.
after that.
she ask me go home & sleep.
had family xmas party.

went down to DXO @ bout 10plus.
went down with my school friends.
manage to find a ID.
thanks to lyd's fren.
haha!
my name ytd was huiyun. HAHA!
went thru the stupid bouncer.
saw alot of people ytd!
saw huiting wen we came out to eat.
then saw carmen after we go back.
saw mich & xinyi.
lend mich fone to call.
so in the end me & my frends join them.
xinyi's frends came too.
mavis,peiqi & sharry.
dont know how spell their name lah.
anyway.
we all went down to the dance floor at bout 11plus.
then we started to dance all the way till 1plus.
then we went to get a drink.
& i went to find carmen
was like happily scandaling with her.
haha!! (:
dance with xinyi & all of them.
got guys hold them till like waht like that.
then they start to switch partner.
then in the end.
those who got touched will dance with me
haha!im like the body guard lah.
saw urania ytd!
too bad she didnt dance with me!
i tink im going back to love R&B.
ytd was like so crazy man!
the whole crowd was like so weird la.
but within ourself own clique was still quite fun la.
grinding was fun! (:
go clubbing no grinding no fun!! (:
didnt really see pretty or beautiful girls.
haha! (:

oh ya! before i forget.
saw natlim & her frend.
i was dancing with sharry.
when they play the song sexyback.
i danced with nat.
after the song.
mich dance with nat & i dance with her friend.
everyone was so hyper & crazy
when they play the song.
that thing you do.
our dance step became so retro.
doing some weird & funny stuff.

after the last song.
we were about to get out of the dance floor
then i saw guihe&her fren.
we walk tgt to go line up for out bags.
talked to guihe& her fren.
heard bout new things.
waht should i say bout it
feeling that im a fucking stupid idiot?
im so naive & dumb.
is the news right or wrong?
i tink i have to ask the person herself.
feeling like an dumb ass.

i gtg already.
blog when im back later.
going to countdown for xmas.
bye.

2006-12-22T12:41:00.000+08:00

im tired of everything already.
you're making me very miserable now.
aiyahs. dont know what to blog lah!
im going nuts now.
i really wanna hug you & never let go.
i wanna hold your hand tight & never let go.
i want you to lie in my arms
& never leave me.
i want you in my life.

2006-12-21T11:48:00.000+08:00

had not been sleeping ytd.
been thinking the whole night.
what if one day smth happen & i get out of your life.
what will happen to you.
what will you be thinking bout.
will you be missing me?
will you think bout me?
i reallly need to know what you're thinking now.
i need to know your heart is for who.
i need to know who you love.
are you still getting over her?
are you still in love with her?
sighs.
im going nuts.
tell me you love me please.

iloveyougirl.
youaremyone&only.
iwantyouinmylifeforever&ever.
ireallycantlivewithoutyou.
sayyoulovemetoo.
imaginemewithoutyou.

im on the verge of dying.
im like holding onto something dangerous.
which might anytime explode
& i will get hurt.

im trying so hard to be there for you whenever you need me.
im trying hard to protect you
im trying hard to make you love me.
im trying hard to do everything for you.
im trying so hard to just get you to look at me for one sec.
iloveyou.
iwantyoubadly.

2006-12-20T16:02:00.000+08:00

hey guys.
its had been long since i blog.
oh my gosh.
alot of things happened.
anyway.
ytd went to meet lijie & hazel.
went to eat lunch tgt.
then hazel went to work.
me & lijie roam the whole of parkway.
after that we went to find hazel.
lijie keep on trying clothes.
& we had fun in the stupid dressing room.
took photos.
then we went to slack around.
reach home at about 11.
then went to sleep.
wake up at 3pm.
haha!
now blogging & waiting for time to pass.
going for chalet later.

i love you more then you could imagine.
i miss you.
come to me as my arms will always be open to you.
i will always be here to protect you.
im willing to do anything for you.

2006-12-14T01:37:00.000+08:00

im so sad now.
the news just stab thru my heart.
i dont know what to do now.
i just keep crying like mad.
dont know what to think now.
i need someone to tell me everything is fine.
yes,im talking to amanda now.
& ya i feel better.
baobei never fail to make me feel better.
thanks baobei.
thanks those people who were here for me.
im like so in my own world now.
talking to myself like some idiot ass.
i dont know lahs.
i nowadays one day eat one meal only.
my tummy is gone.
i dont feel like eating at all.
didnt slp well at all.
is it jetlag or is it just me.
i dont know.
but i doubt its jetlag.
anyway.
i just cant seem to fall asleep now.
talking on the fone to entertain myself till tmr morning.
went for movie today
not bad!
didnt really understand at first.
then slowly understand already.
dont know lahs.
feeling so irritated now.
i wanna go cool off.
i cry till my pillow wet already.
my eyes are swollen.
im going nuts.
im going crazy
BYE.

i love you alot.
i miss you alot.
dont ever doubt my love for you.
i need you more then you ever knw.

when you lose someone you love alot.
rmb to ask that person.
where can you ever find someone who love you as much as i do.

2006-12-11T20:29:00.000+08:00

now im at the aussie airport.
yays!! spore here i come!
finally can go back le!
i miss my bed alot alot!
having backaches here! haha!
but i will miss the beach here!
body surf is fun!
walking ard without flip flops is fun too!
anyway.
gonna blog when im home aft i wake up.
bye guys!
i will be back soon!! (:

2006-12-10T19:34:00.000+08:00

im so bored now!
hearing songs & drinking with my cousins.
trying to find entertainment now.
that stupid nat lim is asking me to go clubbing on the 12th
& im wondering why is she so good.
& im guessing cus she is selling the tix.
& im right!
she will never be so kind.
asshole.
whatever. i will be too tired to go.

i miss you alot alot alot!!
im going crazy over you.
you lifted me up high everytime you're near me.
you set my heart on fire.
i love you.
ROAR!
i so wanna see you now!

2006-12-10T17:15:00.000+08:00

ytd went to the beach
played with the huge waves!
was damn wet lorh.
the waves was COOL! (:
hope to have more of this!
did a little tanning on the coast.
i was good to apply sun block ytd.
after the beach
we went to shop around.
bought new sunglasses again.
eat & eat at the fair there.HEES!
after that went back to the motel at bout 6pm.
went online to talk.
oh ya.the day before ytd.
i finally talked to lijie.
miss her so much lah! (:
miss her nonsense & noise.
anyway. my darling talked to me the day before ytd oso.
you all must be wondering which one right.
cause i have a lot.
rachel darling.. (:
she suddenly come tell me she miss me alot alot.
HAHA!some crazy ass lah she.
then she say she tried calling me alot of times
cause she wanna ask me out.
some ass lor.
when im in spore dont want ask.
i go le then ask.
but yupps!
she ask me buy xmas card from her when im back in spore.
8 cards for $15.
& i got no choice but to say yes.
the same dumb dumb me.LOL!
she going out with me to town or somewhere
when i go back to spore.
i think it should be fun
so long never go out with her le.HAHA!
go back spore need to go out & meet up with alot of people.
andrea..rachel..mich..cyn&swan..lijie..audrey&charlene.
& many many more....
ya.wahtever.continue...
& we went for dinner at 10pm can!
i was like so damn hungry already.
went to eat shabu-shabu!
it was damn nice lahs!
but it was expensive;$186 aussie dollars.
we left at bout 12am like that.
reach the motel at bout 1plus.
went straight to bed.

today morning wake up at 8am.
today going to cousin hse & stay.
so we all shift over.
tmr night going back le.
anyway yes.
we went for breakfast at gold coast.
my brother went out today with his frends.
my elder cousin stay at home to pack the hse.
as she graduate le & going back to spore le. yays~
my mum,aunt & uncle going shoping.
me & my two cousin go MOVIE WORLD today! weeeeees*
went to take lots of photos.
entertained my younger cousin
by playing those kiddy rides
then after she play all finish le
then me & my another cousin
proceed on to play those adult ride.
all the roller coaster were cool man!
sit the hanging one & the superman roller coaster
the superman thingy was like so scary la.
go up then went drop down
is drop straight down de can!
had fun there.
went to watch shows & the 4-D shrek thingy.
it was funny lah.
left at 530pm like that.
we were the last few people to get out. HAHA.
uncle came to pick us up.
went back home & now im using the computer.
the two mummies are cooking in the kitchen now!
soon i will be away & be bathing.HAHA!
cant wait to get my ass back in spore.
my mind & heart have been in spore ever since i left for korea & aussie.
gonna upload the fotos soon.
provided i can rmb which folder did i transfer the fotos too. HEES
i admit im dumb ok. (:
goodbye. gonna go hug my bathtub le! (:

i miss you alot.
i hope i can hug you now.
i hope you can be right here with me now.
take good care of yourself.
im always here for you.
i will always be the shoulder that you can rely on.
i will always be the shoulder you cry on.
i will always be there for you.
iloveyou. <3

2006-12-08T20:33:00.000+08:00

im so bored!
not at my cousin's house.
staying here tonight.
they just watch tv.
im sitting in the room with the lappy.
went to sea world today.
went to play the rides & watch the shows
by the dolphins & seals & other things.
had fun there bahs.
the sun was so hot!
so i first time will listen & put sunblock lotion.LOL!
& i realised i didnt became tan afterall.
tmr going to the beach!
go back spore i want to sentosa.
i want go tanning.
who is interested to go with me?haha!
im like hearing my cousin quarreling with her bf.
sighs~
its bad to hear people quarrel.
nvm.i should just mind my own business.

you are not online.
you are nowhere to be found.
imissyou.

2006-12-06T19:07:00.000+08:00

okaes.im back in brisbane now.
staying in this motel.
need to pay to use the computer.
unless using our own wireless then need go outside.
its cold here now.
went to lone pine.
feed the wildlife there had some fun.
but i only can say my heart is still in spore.
i miss you yes i do.
tmr going to my cousin house & stay
then can have some talk.
now im talking online with dorcas.
the time difference here is 2hrs.
so its 9plus here?
over here oso dont have much things to play like the cities before.
but just nw after dinner
we went to the top of this mountain
& the view was very very nice!
its the view of whole of brisbane!
how i wish you are here with me.
i so wanna hug you & see the view.
anyway yes.
gtg soon.
tmr going shopping..
so bored for me!
cause i hate shopping!! hahas!
& yes. i miss my mei mei!! LIJIE!!
i miss her nonsense.
& of cause i miss alot alot of ple.
miss amanda baobei & bella jie & dorcas ahyi!
& many many others.
i hope everyone is doing fine.
dorcas is doing fine then thats good.hahas!

i miss you alot.
miss the times when you lie on my shoulder
i just simply miss everything.
things are getting so complicated now.
my mind is getting complicated too.
i dont know what to think now.
& maybe i dont even wanna think bout it.
i think i better have a early night.
im getting really sick now.
i need you now to take care of me.
but too bad you're not around now.
when im back meet me ok.
i want you to sayang me.
sighs~
if only you're free to do so.

i so wanna bring you out to eat
i so wanna bring you to esplanade & watch the sea view.
i so wanna hold you & walk down everything in life.
i will always love you.

where can i find someone who loves me more then anything?

2006-12-04T20:20:00.000+08:00

sighs.
sitting at the balcony of the apartment.
had a great dinner today.
its so late here now.
its bout 11pm plus le.
you're not online.
& i miss you alot.
drinking here & hearing songs
looking into the sky
& thinking bout you & me.
the situation that im in now is so bad.
dont know what im thinking now.
tears drop suddenly for no god damn it reasons.
its cold sitting here.
im already down with fever & slight flu.
looking at our pictures & wanting to hold you now.
wanna play around with you now.
even when i sleep i dream about you & me.
tell me now ok.
what am i to do without you!?
i really cant take it anymore.
im dying without you nw
i dont rely on you
but i need you
i cant live without you
i cant breathe without you.
i cant be without you.
hearing the song.. no promises.
my eyes are getting watery now.
im really so lost now.
all i wanna do now is to see you.
just a small glance will do.
will i be able to see myself in you?
i dont know.
or will i see someone else in you when i go back to spore?
i dont know.
im off to my own world now.
not sleeping tonight
but need to go offline already.
need to wake up at 430am aussie time which is like 130am spore time
going to watch the sunrise.
hope you are here to see it with me.
nights everybody.

iloveyou.imissyou.
bewithmetilltheendoftime.

2006-12-04T19:14:00.000+08:00

this song is nice.the lyrics is GOOD! hahas.
out of reach - gabrielle

knew the signs wasnt right.
swept away by you
& now i feel like a fool
so confused,
my heart's bruised
was i ever loved by you?
out of reach,so far
i never had your heart
out of reach, couldnt see
we were never meant to be
catch myself from despair
i could drown if i stay here
keeping busy everyday
i know i will be OK
but i was so confused,
my heart's bruised
was i ever loved by you?
we were never meant to be
so much hurt
so much pain
takes a while to regain what is lost inside
& i hope thast in time,
you will be out of my mind
& i will be over you
but now im so confused
my heart's bruised
was i ever loved by you?
out of reach, so far
i never had your heart
out of reach, couldnt see
we were never meant to be
out of reach , so far
you never gave your heart
in my reach , i can see
there's a life out there for me.

2006-12-01T19:43:00.000+08:00

im back sitting in front of the computer again.
went walking around sydney today.
& i mean it WALK!
never drive today.
im here at the hotel lobby using the god damn it 2 dollars for 20mins d com.
im stoning.
hearing the songs.
stoning & singing to myself.
conclusion is ... im going crazy can.
WHATEVER!!

i miss you like crazy.
give my love to you.
where are you now.
wondering whether you have a great time in spore w/o me.
hope you are not thinking to much bout stuffs.
& you are thinking bout me.
i love you.i love you.i love you.
i miss you so so much now can.
sighs!!
how i wish i can fly back to spore now.
& im always wishing that you & me can stay in aus one day.
ok fine.i might be thinking to much alrdy.HAHAS
missing you so much now.
i miss the times when you say you miss me.
sighs.
i want you hold you tight now & never let go.
bye.gtg already.
leaving sydney tmr & going canberra.
nights! (:

i miss you.i love you.

2006-11-30T21:14:00.000+08:00

i miss singapore suddenly.
& most importantly i missed you.
a few seconds missed & its a waste.
im so depressed nowdays.
staring out of the window & hearing the songs we hear
dont know waht to do & think
wahtever lahs.
anyway ya.
im in sydney now.
3hrs difference.
had a full dinner.
& feeling so bloated now.
anyway ya.

i miss you alot alot now.
i wanna see you now.
walking pass all the places & streets hoping you are right beside me.
all i need is a chance from you.
i will love you tenderly.
i will always love you.
trust my love for you.
miss me ok!
i love you.
i miss you.
take care of yourself.

2006-11-25T19:14:00.000+08:00

this song is nice- give my love

when i look in your eyes
i can see that you want to be with me but you're scared.
& i dont know what to say or do
but the tears keep falling from your eyes
& i know that time wun change my love
& i cant do nothing to keep you
oh , i'll give my love.
oh , when i hold you tight
give my love through kisses oh so bright
& you know that i cant change my loe
take my love all through the night.
as the hours pass away
you think that love aint here to stay.
feel a beat from your chest
but you dont give doubt a moment's rest.
you dream the future & all you see is dark.
listen to your heart , baby
the truth will set sparks.

i love this song alot.
its damn nice ok.

i miss the times hearing songs with you.

2006-11-25T19:09:00.000+08:00

will you still love me tomorrow morning?
i will love you forever & ever like the never ending oceans.

im in aussie now. weeeeeeeeees*
the time here is like 2 hrs earlier then spore's.
its bout 8plus here now.
had dinner just now.
so full now lahs!
im so bored now.
luckily i have my lappy with me!
looking at photos as i have nth better to do.
hmmmmms.
having random thoughts now.
thinking bout the times we had together.
thinking bout the stupid photos that we took tgt.
i miss you alot now.
anyway..
shall blog later or tmr.
im going to play game le! HAHAS!
bye everyone.

i miss you badly.
i need you badly.
i love you more then you could imagine.
come to me baby & dont ever get out of my life.
you are my oxygen my everything.
i need you next to me to keep me going on in life.
what can i do to make you love me.
say you wun leave me
say you will love me forever & ever.
ask me whether i'll still love you tmr morn
& you will get a answer which comes from the bottom of my heart.
i love you honey.
you are sweeter then anything else.
whenever you are beside me
i can feel this special feeling tingling in me.
you always give me this special feeling which i can never explain.
i love the feeeling whenever you lie on my shoulder.
iloveyou.

2006-11-24T19:57:00.000+08:00

got back from korea today morning at bout 1am plus.
IM SO TIRED!! ROAR!!
had fun there. & know quite a lot of new friends.
lazy to blog down what i did there
but yupps.
when to ski and went to play at the amusment park.
it was fun there & it was damn big there lahs!
the temperature there
was like -10 at night,5 in the morn & bout 10 in the afternoon.
those aunties keep disturbing me say i smoking.
hahas! cause when i talk got cold air.
reach home at bout 1plus.
happily use the com & went to slp.

now preparing to go aussie already!
so bored now lahs!
i think i will rot there! HAHA!
preparing to take a lot of photos with my cousin! hahas!
we will happily take alot of dumb and pathetic photos! hahas!
i might be bring my lappy over! haha!
ITS JUST MAYBE ONLY.
i think im going crazy now lahs!
had a fun time going crazy.

I WILL MISS EVERYBODY!

i will miss you alot alot.do take care of yourself.
protect yourself & go home early.
dont play till forget the time.
i will miss you & will be thinking of you.
i love you like the endless river even when there's a drought
i wun disappoint my love for you.
you must have that trust in me.
i will love you on & on.
say you love me too.
take good care of your health.
imissyou.iloveyou.bye.

2006-11-18T21:26:00.000+08:00

sighs.
things are getting to be so confusing now lahs!
i dont know lahs!
anyway. people.
im going overseas today! now! hahas!
coming back on 24th morning.
im off le! bye bye!

dont say sorry to me.cause i odnt blame or hate you.
im the one who should say sorry instead of you.
cause i lied to you too!bye! take care of yourself.
& i wil miss you! take care. dont cry anymore.
cheer up & smile like how you always do. (:

2006-11-13T11:42:00.000+08:00

im so bored now lahs!! ROAR!!
someone save me can or not.
im dying of boredness.

sighs.
why is it that nobody trust me when i say i wanna settle dwn.
forget it.maybe it meant to be this way then.
i seriously wanna settle down with the one i love.
is it just so hard to believe it when i say settle dwn.
i did settle down for twice or thrice.
but in the end i got hurt and thay person leave me
its not that i dont wanna settle down
flinging around is not fun at all.
i dont even enjoy flinging.
i just wanna stay with the person i love.
i really wanna settle down tis time.

sighs.
who is the one for me?
i dont even know.
telling myself that fate is in my own hands
but yes,i tried all i can already.
if it still failed and sometimes the decisions doesnt lies on me
i really dont know what to do.

these few days i can really say that im feeling so lost.
dont know what to think and waht to do.
seriously i need someone now to guide me in what im to do.
cracking my brain everyday thinking bout it
i cant seem to fall asleep easily nowadays.
must think till i sleep.
easily having headaches nowadays.
i serious need a huge huge dose of my medicine.
who shall be my medicine..hmms.god knows.

im going crazy soon.
going overseas soon..
cant bare to leave cus i dont know why.
dont even feel like going.

sighs! ge wo ni de ai. (:
wo xu yao ni zai wo de shen bian.
hearing ni na me ai ta.
people just love to sing this song to me. whatever~
ROAR!!
its raining heavily heavily~
i want to go into the rain!! drench myself man!cool~
okaes.concluded that im mad.

i just need your trust and your love.
trust me that i will settle down and that i really love you.
its never a crush and its purely love.
i need you in my life.
i tend to miss you easily.cus i dont know why.BLAHS!
im so not myself lahs! oh my my~
LALALALALALALALAS*
WEEEEEEEEEEES*
i need you to tell me everything is ok and fine.
im stupid and dumb and i can dont know anything
but one thing i know is i love you and only you.
sighs! one day and im waiting for that day to come
waiting for that miracle to happen.

knowing that nth is impossible
and knowing that i really love you
i decided to hold on to this love and wun let go.

that's when i love you. (:

2006-11-13T09:16:00.000+08:00

what can i do to make you love me?
what can i do to make you care?
iloveyou.

so bored~ weeeeeeeeeeeees*
my heart died deep down inside.
HAHAHAAHAHAHAS!
i wanna fly~

nth much to say these days.
imissyou*
iloveyou*
ineedyou*
iwantyou*

p.s.hate people questioning me.gettting easily irritated nowadays.

2006-11-12T00:08:00.000+08:00

when you go crazy how i wish i can be there with you to give you a hug
and tell you that everything is fine
as i will always be there for you.

i can conclude in relationship or as friends.
whats more important is whether you are happy or not.
which do you feel more comfortable in.
friends or lovers?
when things come to a certain stage.
someone must decide it.

life is just so unpredictable.
one min its so sweet and happy
the next min or sec it change to be a disaster that you'll never want.
no matter in the end what decisions you make.
dont ever regret it.
you might be able to turn back but sometimes it cant be changed.

anyway..yupps!
got no mood to blog lahs! ROAR!

i love you alot alot!
i miss you alot alot!
have faith in me and yourself.
i love you.

2006-11-10T23:24:00.000+08:00

nth much to blog about today.
just wanna say...............

I LOVE YOU! I MISS YOU! I NEED YOU ! (:

2006-11-09T11:18:00.000+08:00

even if the sun refuse to shine,even is romance ran out of rhyme
you would still have my heart until the end of time
you're all i need,my love,my valentine.

early in the morning
hear some god damn it news.
totally so turn off now.
dont know what to do now.
dont know what to think now.
feeling the cold treatment.
wanna cry out anytime.
asking myself now.
when did i ever become so weak and brittle.
the answer was i dont know.
i dont even know what i did wrong now
i dont mind doing anything for you.
as long as you are happy with life
im willing to give up anything in exchange for that.
i gave you my heart from the start
and now im asking you whether do you still need it.
if you feel happier without me in your life then i will leave.
and i will protect you no matter what.
how i wish you will be touched by the things i do
but i doubt you did cause you still remain the same.

tell me that im the biggest fool on earth.
i can feel that my heart is tearing apart now.
stop ripping it open cause it hurts alot.
how i wish a car can really bang me when i cross the road.
feeling so god damn it stress now lahs.
dont know what to do now.
i want her to smile and smile.
i dont want her to frown.
it will make me happy if she's happy.
im so lost now.
im left hanging in the middle of nowhere.
you're half dead and im dead.

im so stupid , im so stupid.
kaven tan , kaven tan!
look at the mirror and see yourself now.
you are like a piece of crap now
so dead and useless.
nobody is willing to trust me when it comes to love.
i love you so much and you tell me you dont trust my love.
naive fool im! scold me for being the biggest fool okaes.
i realy cant let you go.
i will just die right on the spot.

i wanna see you now.
but i cant.
forget it okaes.
i should just hide at home and cry myself to sleep.

weeeeeeeeeeees*
WAHAHAHAHAHAS!
im fine im fine.
what can possibly go wrong lahs!
im alrights~